Reason for Recession in America

Lighter Side

My previous manager was a good man giving his employees good amount of freedom at work, understanding them and mainly not yelling at them. One could always see him smile and that made everyone around him feel good. He would come down to a person and talk to him/her in a very polite manner and get things done. No doubt most of the employees liked him.

I usually used to work in the second shifts hence always used to stay late in the office. One day I was surprised to see lights on in my manager’s cabin. I looked at the clock it was 9 P.M. I thought there must be really something important going on or else he wouldn’t be staying this late. As I was thinking all these I saw a ping in my instant messenger. It was my manager. He said, “Sridhar, have you got Rs. 4000/-  with you now, I need it urgently as there will be no banks open till now I can’t go and withdraw the money.” I thought he must be in real great need or else he wouldn’t be asking me like this. I said, I don’t have that much money with me now. He asked do you have it in your bank account. I replied, yes. He then asked me do you have an internet banking account. I said yes I do have it but I have never used it before. He said no problem, can you owe me 4000 rupees.  Thinking that he is real grave need I said yes. Then he said, ok I’ll come down to your place and we’ll transfer it to my account. He also said that he will make sure that he will return me the money by tomorrow evening. I said that’s fine with me. And then he walked up to me and did the transfer himself teaching me along the way on how to do internet fund transfer. He walked away saying thanks to me and I was feeling very happy for being able to help a person in crisis and that person being my manager made me feel even more proud. Also, he being a nice guy helping him made me feel very good.

Three days passed and I didn’t hear back anything from my manager. Again the same situation repeated. This time again he was in office late night and he pinged me asking for more money. I said I only have Rs.3000/- with me He asked me to transfer it to him. I did it without any hesitation. Two days went by again and because of a political turmoil in the city I was working from home. I again got a ping from my manager requesting for money. This time I said I cannot give more than 1000/-. He said he is deep crisis and that any amount would help him. I did the transfer again but this time I was not happy. I started doubting this persons intentions now.

Month passed away and I received my salary. The very next day after my salary being credited I get a call from my manager when I’m in office asking for money. This time I’m a bit protective and started telling him that I got problems of my own. But he was not letting go of it. He swore that he would return my entire amount by the end of this week This time he was not asking for any amount, instead he was demanding Rs.5000/-. Atlast unwillingly I had to transfer it to him.

Months passed and I used to hear nothing from him regarding my money. Pressure started increasing for me at home. But I being me was hesitant to ask him. Slowly I started knowing that I was not alone most of my colleagues had fallen into the trap of my manager.

I started asking him for money but he kept saying some cock and bull story and postponing it. Fortunately one day he called me inside his cabin and returned me an amount of Rs.8000/-  and that he would be returning the remaining amount by the weekend. I was happy to get the amount  because I had lost all hopes of recovering that amount.

Suddenly one day I came to know that he was fired from the company and that he has left the city. I could see my hard earned Rs.5000/- vanishing after him.

Few weeks later I get a call from his dearest friend one of my colleague who owes me another Rs.1000/- and speaks everything with me except for the money that he owes me saying that Madhava is in banglore and might be flying to USA for a short trip.

Then there is a long silence, I don’t hear about anyone from anywhere. Suddenly I start hearing that America is again into recession and that it has lost huge money. I could only suspect one great mind behind it. If you are smart enough you should have by now known the reason why America is into recession again J

Tukhradiya

jab bhi woh gum mein tha usne mera sahara liya tha
jab bhi woh dard mein tha mere khande pe woh rotha tha

uski gum bhari kahaniyan sun kar ratein kaate hai maine
unhi raaton mein usey zindagi jeena sikhayee hai maine

khushiyan jab aayee un gum ke dino ko woh bhool gaya
gum ke saath saath usney mujhe bhi tukhradiya

Yeh Dil Tu Kyon Dhadakta Hai

jab bhi is dil ne usko chaha hai
har baar maine ne use samjhaya hai

door rehne ki koshish karta hoon bahut
phir bhi dil usi ki taraf kheenca chala jata hai

jab bhi woh gum mein rehti hai
dil mera kyon rota hai

woh humesha mujhe tukhrati hai
phir bhi yeh dil usi keliye tadap tha hai

har baar aisa kyon hota hain
yeh dil tu  kyon dhadakta hain


Written after getting Inspired from Javed Akhtar's shayari in Zindagi Mile Na Dobara :-)

Dandruff & Himalaya Herbal Shampoo

After watching lots of advertisements on Himalaya Herbal Shampoo I thought of giving it a try. Although I’m not a chronic patient of dandruff, I do have few of them scattered around my hair. Once in a month using something like All Clear or Head & Shoulders is enough to keep them under control. The name “Himalaya” sounded nice and being an advocator of using Indian products I thought of using it.

After using it I was not satisfied as I saw my dandruff coming up within 3 days of my shower. Initially I didn’t bother about it, thought its because I need to get adjusted for herbal things as I have been using harmful chemicals till now. But slowly I developed into a chronic patient of dandruff, scratching my head every now and them, embarrassing myself everywhere. I thought of doing a small experiment to make sure that the problem was with the Himalaya Shampoo. I changed the shampoo and saw my dandruff go. Used Himalaya and there it was, the small tiny white particles falling from hair like snow. I got mad on Himalaya and a wild thought stuck my brain. I was thinking of suing Himalaya for wrong advertisement and fooling the innocent and ignorant consumers like me and profiting out of them.

However, before suing I just wanted to read the instructions written in the back of the container to make sure that I followed the instructions correctly and that I didn’t mess up anything. I was doing this because usually I end up losing and putting a sad face before everyone whenever I challenge anyone. So I thought its better to read the instructions carefully and then go for it.

Here is what it was written on the back of the container:

Directions for use: Apply to wet hair. Lather. Leave for 1-2 minutes and rinse. Repeat if necessary. Safe for daily use. For best results, follow up with the Himalaya Herbals Protein Container.

I was happy cos I have done the same thing that was instructed. I was sure of winning this case. I started imagining the directors of Himalaya coming to my house and bribing me to withdraw the case, media people interviewing me. I was feeling like a hero. After a nice half an hour of fairy land trip I finally came back to senses and thought of reading what was written further down just to make sure that I haven’t left any stone unturned.

Below was list of ingredients and the following:

Ayurvedic Proprietary Medicine. Safe to use on artificially colored or premed hair. Hypoallergenic. No harmful Chemicals. No animal testing. Avoid contact with eyes. For external use only.

After reading this all my dreams disappeared, I kept the shampoo in the shelf and walking out said to my mother, “Mom, I’m not suing the Himalayas, they have the instructions clearly written”.

Mom & My Marriage Proposal

One day my mom came down to me and said; look it’s time that we start looking out a match for you so that you can get settled in your life. It’s your life and you have to decide how you want it to be.

But mom I said, “I have just started my career, I don’t' want to get married now. Let me get myself a good position, earn few money, buy myself a car and then I will go for it.

All this will happen along the way, she said becoming a little bit serious, “Marriage is not going to hamper your growth it will only make you more responsible. As I said it’s your life and you have to decide. So what do you say, I'm going for it even if you say "no".

OK mom as you say, do I have an option?

She smiled a bit, good boy she said and continued “What type of girl you want, let me know your preference so that we can search a similar girl. As I said it’s your life and you have decide for it, at the end it’s you both who are going to live together so she must match your taste, now tell me. I got happy, felt although I don't have a freedom to choose when to get married at least I got freedom to choose my kind of a girl, I started thinking for a while, suddenly mom interrupted and said "what are you thinking, what's in there so much to think, for each and everything you start thinking deeply, now tell me quick I’m waiting. So not wanting to irritate my mother any more I started...

She must be beautiful, caring, understanding, empathetic, smart, intelligent & knowledgeable. Good said my mom. This is what everyone wants mom; I would need few qualities more

Mom: Like?

Me: she should know what P=NP problem is, don’t even consider her if she asks what is it ?

Must be good at more than one language

Mom: like what HIndi, english...??

Me: No... No those are prerequisites; I'm talking about languages like java, python, php likewise

Must be a Linux enthusiast

Doesn't matter if she doesn’t like to play but a person who will listen to me eagerly on how I entered a terrorist camp all alone, killed 160 most dangerous terrorist and rescued all hostages alive in a counter strike game

One who praises me on how I build beautiful cities and administer them in Sims city or better if she builds them along with me?

I could see my mom's face change but she was silent, it was like she was thinking what this guy is talking about

but I kept going, she must have a active twitter and facebook account, doesn't matter if she don't have followers but her post and people whom she is following should be wonderful. Good if she is blogger and has a website of her own.

Should have won the four in a row game at least once “as I have won it two times" I giggled

I could see my mother’s expression change a lot, it was like she wanted to say something but didn't know what to say, but I went on,

Her favorite channels should be animal planet, NGC, discovery, pursuit of happyness, few good men should be in her favorite move list

Should not be a fan of Sharukh Khan or Hritik Roshan... bollywood and tollywood movies should not interest her much

That should do it... if I remember anything else I will let you know I said and stopped.

Mom was silent for a while, and then she said. You are not recruiting anyone for a job. We need a girl who can take care of our home and raise a family, not another animal who sits entire day before that box without knowing what’s going on at home.

Be reasonable and stop making fun of it. I said I was not joking, I'm serious and that I want such a girl.

Then you are not going to get one she interrupted furiously. I said, “but mom this is what I want....”

Stop joking everywhere seedu she said

I went silent telling to myself that was no joke.

After a bit of silence, I said ok.. Keeping the prerequisites constant i don’t' want a working girl. Good if she is a teacher rest you can ignore. I couldn't believe I just said that

Mom didn’t agree for this as well, she works or not it’s her choice we should not bother her. Also if she earns its good we get extra income if she doesn't want we don’t' want her to go. You cannot put such conditions on any one.

By this time my dad who was listening to all the conversation came down and said what he has to briefly but effectively as he always does:

He said “Real men don’t love the most beautiful & intelligent girl in the world, they love the girl who can make their world the most beautiful and make them intelligent. “

I was awestruck for few moments by that statement.

I said to mom, "Get any girl of your choice mom"

My mom was so happy; she smiled and said that's my boy..... As I keep saying it’s your life and you have to decide what you want.

Hearing that again I giggled and said to myself "yeah mom... it’s just that you’re the driver of it"

Note: Please all of you reading this don't come to me asking are you going to get married, no its not, this is just a creation out of my imagination. Just felt this is what happens in many indian families hence this article:-)